We all experience our life in our own way. We walk. We dance. We run. We
rest. We weave our way through our days. There are times when we will hold
hands. There are times when we will silently walk alone. With one foot in
front of the other, with one sacred breath after another, we forge ahead,
never fully knowing what the next turn will bring. Yet somehow we find the
will to move forward.
This complex dance of life we lead can be a beautiful and full production
number. There is pageantry and flow. Bright and joyous colors saturate our
stage. Waves of love and bliss quench our thirst and ignite our dreams that
set our soul on fire. We laugh and love. We let our spirits soar. We are free
and feel so alive. Nothing can stop us as we move with passion and courage.
Then there are the lyrical and poetic movements that that take us deep
within our core. The quiet and private soliloquy leads us down into our
depths where the only witness is our own heart. We whisper our hopes and
dreams into the Winds. We cry to release our sorrow, pain, and fear. We dig
deeper into our darkness so we can shine forward our light. We take comfort
knowing that sometimes even the darkness is beautiful, there is grace in raw
emotion, and that there is immense courage in vulnerability. We know that in
our imperfection there is beauty. When we feel lost, we can turn to our own
beating heart and know that we are alive with the pulse of life that connects
us all together. We are not alone. We are part of the fabric of life. We are an
important piece that is needed and wanted. We must believe it. We must
trust that.
Through the last few rainy weeks, I have felt the pangs of spiritual growth
within the darkness and the light. There have been good days and emotional
ones with everything in between. There were days when silence, solitude,
and rest were craved. Other days were filled with cheerful smiles and
comforting cuddles. I have laughed and cried. I have had sleepless nights
and naps in the afternoon. I was exhausted. I was physically, mentally,
emotionally and spiritually drained. I did not know what my next complete
next step would be. I did not have many answers. I did not know how long it
would last…
In a lot of ways I still don’t. But I do know this: even with this mix
of light and dark in this twilight time, I walk. I will forge ahead knowing that I
am not alone. I trust that there is a plan unfolding before me, even when it is
unknown to me. This dance I lead is unique but others have been here before.
With my eyes closed and hands on my heart, I can feel the beat within.
With a slow breath I merge with the flow of life all around me. I stand
with those I love and that love me. I stand with the Goddess and God. I stand
with myself, for I will not abandon myself in my darkness. This is my practice.
This is who I am. I will not deny that anymore.
It is times like this when ritual and routine comfort me. I take solace in
setting sacred space, lighting candles, and meditation. I love the sound of a
pen pouring emotions from my heart as it glides across my journal’s page.
Connecting with Nature, the Goddess, and my guides help me to understand
as I move to heal and gain insight. Yes, this can be an emotional and tricky
path, but it is the practice of the spiritual journey. They are all tools that we
have to help us along. It is the practice and discipline that can help us ease
the hidden gems from the many different soul parts that have been lost
along the way. If we can polish the edges of our difficult lessons and discover
the treasures, our treasures that they leave behind, isn’t that worth it? The
action of self -love and care is an act of love and honor for ourselves. Yes, it
may take a lot of time, focus, energy, and effort, but in the end it is worth it.
Aren’t you worth that? I believe that you are.
We all have a belief system, our code of ethics. It’s our way of life. It is who
we are. It isn’t something that is separate from ourselves. When we open our
heart to those we love and offer them comfort and understanding in their
time of need, we do so willingly. We hold space for them. We listen and offer
support. Even when we get busy and a loved one is hurting, we stop and
help. Our beliefs and values do not get placed into a box upon a dusty shelf.
If we can help, we help.
So I ask you this: why do you sometimes place yourself inside the dark box, shuttered away
when you get busy? When we feel low, that is when we need our practice the most.
Yes, it can be painful. It can take us to a place we don’t fully understand. It can be exhausting.
But when we take one step at a time, one breath at a time, we forge ahead. We
make progress. We offer ourselves the love, respect, and care we freely offer
others. This is not a selfish act. It is an act of love and respect for who we are
and for what we have experienced. It is the birth of who we are meant to be
as we become our truth. Embrace this dance. Understand that the rains will
come to quench the thirst of our dreams and of our souls. We must love
ourselves freely and unconditionally. We can dig as we search for our secret
treasures and uncover the hidden beauty that we have been longing for.
This is your dance. This is your practice. Remove yourself from the locked and
hidden depths that hide all of your beautiful colors. You deserve the joy and
love this lifetime brings. Take a chance on yourself and run free. Yes, the
pains of your spiritual growth can be difficult, but the bounty on the other
side is better than you can even imagine. Trust. Dance. Walk. Run. Rest. This
is your unique journey. Make every step, twist, and turn your own. You
deserve that.
